Deep thoughts

by Elliam Fakespeare (and friends)

+ George Lucas digitally cloned all those wookies in Episode III because more than six on the set would have sunk the budget on catering.

+ If the Hamburgler were shot while fleeing, it really would be ketchup blood on the wall. How economical.

+ Would a transsexual bully tease a transsexual sissy by saying it menstruates like a girl?

+ My uncle once told me if you play Bob Dylan backwards, it sounds like Bob Dylan.

+ You should set your watch ahead five minutes so you’re not late for your funeral.

+ What does an illiterate mind reader see?

+ It’s time for the world to play man-to-man time.

+ What’s the opposite of “I know”?

+ If the best offense is a good defense, then a good surrender is a decent defense.

+ What’s inside an empty bag?

+ My uncle, a cutting-edge Calvinist, was a sculptor at the School of Hard Knox.

+ Officer, there is, technically speaking, no such thing as a breakable speed limit.

+ If two heads are better than one, then four must be awfully heavy.

+ How do you best learn say the alphabet backwards? Turn around.

+ If what goes up must come down, why should I worry about my blood pressure?

+ These days, Who is benched for Who Cares and What is traded out for Whatever.

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About The Codgitator (a cadgertator)

Catholic convert. Quasi-Zorbatic. Freelance interpreter, translator, and web marketer. Former ESL teacher in Taiwan (2003-2012) and former public high school teacher (2012-2014). Married father of three. Multilingual, would-be scholar, and fairly consistent fitness monkey. My research interests include: the interface of religion and science, the history and philosophy of science and technology, ancient and medieval philosophy, and cognitive neuroscience. Please pray for me.
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